Belonging is...

By Kristen Yost

Belonging is…

buying the same clothes and

products as my

favorite influencer, because

if I have what she has,

I will have the best clothes,

the clearest skin, and

perfect hair.

It’s all in the name of a

better and perfect life, which

I could never afford without

her discount code for 30% off.

slowly loosening my morals to be like

my friends, until

I am accepted –

becoming less cautious of the

words I say, and talk more

aggressive to match their tone

telling them

I’m still here –

until they craft me into their clone,

but ignore me when

a new prospect enters,

like an only child after

a sibling is born.

being told that I am

too much, or too loud

when I get excited or passionate about

exciting endeavors, or

irritating injustices;

so I apologize for my passion,

and say,

“Sorry, that was too loud.

I’m working on it.”

I teach myself to

be more mellow

for them.

being in a serious relationship like

young Christian girls

should do, but

the guy always

leaves me behind.

I wonder,

what’s wrong with me,

as my friends marry

and I become

more alone.

Why is belonging

found only in material possessions?

What if belonging is

buying clothes and products

I like, being proud of

who I am, and

encouraging others to

embrace the

power of their

individuality?

What if belonging is

letting my friends challenge

my beliefs, but not

allowing them to make me

feel any less of a person

when I choose to have a

verbal filter, or not to question

my spiritual beliefs?

What if they accept me

despite

our differences?

What if belonging is

embracing

my vivacious personality,

especially when it’s

too much,

choosing to

grow into it,

the same way a girl

grows into

her body?

What if belonging is

choosing

Eternal Love

over earthly love, and

Internal Love

for myself and others

the same way He loves me?

Belonging requires

acceptance,

and love

from myself,

not others.

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Kristen Yost finished her senior year as a Human Communication major with a Writing minor. She enjoys warm weather and sunshine, everything the Midwest is NOT in the winter. In her free time, she enjoys binge watching new Netflix shows and attending Monday night Bachelor watch parties with her friends.